The Weekly Newspaper serving the citizens of Morenci, Mich., Fayette, Ohio, and surrounding areas.

  • KayseInField
    IN THE FIELD—2004 Morenci graduate Kayse Onweller works in a test plot of wheat in Texas. She’s part of Bayer CropScience’s North American wheat breeding program based in Nebraska, where she completed post-graduate work in plant breeding and genetics.
  • Front.winner
    REFEREE Camden Miller raises the hand of Morenci Jr. Dawgs wrestler Ryder Ryan as his opponent leaves the mat in disappointment. Morenci’s youth wrestling program served as host for a tournament Saturday morning to raise money for the club. Additional photos are on the back page.
  • Front.bank.2
    SHERWOOD STATE Bank opened its Fayette office at a grand opening Friday morning, drawing a large crowd to view the renovated building. Above, Burt Blue talks to teller Cindy Funk, while his wife, Jackie, looks around the new office. The Blues missed the opening and took a quick tour on Tuesday. Few traces remain of the former grocery store and theater, however, part of the original brick wall still shows in the hallway leading to the back of the building. The drive-through window should be ready for customers later in the month.
  • Front.carry.casket
    CARRYING—Riley Terry (blue jacket) and Mason Vaughn lead the way, carrying an empty casket outside to the hearse waiting at the curb. Morenci juniors and seniors visited Eagle Funeral Home last week to learn about the role of a funeral director and to understand the process of arranging for a funeral.
  • Front.lift
    MORENCI student Dalton McCowan puts everything into a dead lift attempt Saturday morning during the Wyseguy Push/Pull event. Lifters helped raise more than $1,600 for the family of the late Devin Wyse, a former Morenci power-lifter who graduated last year. Commemorative T-shirts are still available by contacting teacher Dan Hoffman.
  • Front.make.three
    FROM THE LEFT, Landon Wilkins, Ryan White and Logan Blaker try out their artistic skills Saturday afternoon at the Morenci PTO’s first Date to Create event. More than 50 people showed up to create decorated planks of wood to hang from rope. The event served as a fund-raiser for miscellaneous PTO projects. Additional photos are on the back of this week’s Observer.
  • Front.F.office
    NEW OFFICES—Fayette village administrator Steve Blue speaks with tax administrator Genna Biddix at the new front desk of the village office. Village council members voted to use budgeted renovation funds targeted for the old office and instead buy the vacant bank building on the corner of Main and Fayette streets. The old office was sold to Sherwood State Bank. When everything is put into place in the spacious new village office, an open house will be scheduled. Council member David Wheeler donated all of his time needed to make changes in the bank interior to fit the Village’s needs.

2011.09.08 Never too early to buy a unique Christmas gift

Written by David Green.

By RICH FOLEY 

Too early? Actually, IT’S ONLY THREE MONTHS AWAY!!!! Wait a minute, I already did most of this year’s shopping during the after-Christmas sales in January. I just have to keep from losing track of where I put my purchases between now and December, as well as make sure that gift I bought post-Christmas 2009 doesn’t get forgotten two years running. For any other odd gifting needs, there’s always the Heartland America catalog.

They’re not kidding about the name, either. The company is based in Chaska, Minnesota, with mail processing done in Rapid City, South Dakota. It doesn’t get much more heartland than that. I wonder if Norman Rockwell works in the mailroom? I bought a lamp from them five or six years ago, and the catalogs have come every four or five weeks ever since.

Most of the items are manufacturers final closeouts, so there’s lots of shoes, leather jackets, watches, even the original Ronco Veg-O-Matic. But the odd items are the fun ones, like the Fuel Doctor Platinum, which claims to improve your mileage by 20 percent just by plugging it into the vehicle’s lighter socket. They’ve been running this one for quite a while, so I guess the oil companies don’t consider it a threat.

A bigger menace to us all might be the Zap Cane, “an ingenious combination of a walking stick and a super-powerful stun gun.” In case of trouble, just touch the mugger, loose dog or rude skateboarder with the tip, push the button and one million volts gives them something else to think about. Not available to Michigan residents, luckily. And read the disclaimer about consulting federal, state and local laws before ordering.

Have a concealed weapons permit? Then you might like a fancy concealed weapons permit gold badge with holder, as if you were a real officer. Once again, read the disclaimer: The badge itself is not official. No kidding.

But on to happier items. How about all 43 episodes of the television series “Greatest American Hero” on DVD, just $17.99? Yes, I think I’ll pass, too. Harder to resist might be the complete 103 episode run of “21 Jump Street,” featuring little Johnny Depp, only $24.99.

Like your heroes slightly older? How about 94 episodes of Michael Chiklis as “The Commish,” $24.99? Or a whopping 152 episodes of “Hunter,” starring former NFL star Fred Dryer, only $35.99? It will keep you busy for days!

Then there’s the musical instruments. Items available include guitars, flutes, clarinets and even a mandolin. Not just any mandolin, either, but one “that YouTube celebrity Warren G. called the ‘best darn mandolin I’ve ever played!’...if you’ve followed Warren G. on YouTube, you know that he knows a thing or two about mandolins.”

I’ll happily confess that I spend almost no time on YouTube and doubt they were referring to West Coast rapper Warren G, although the thought of a rapper playing mandolin gave me a chuckle. I went to YouTube and after filtering out postings about the rapper, was left with seven entries concerning the mandolin-playing Warren G.

The most popular of the seven had, as of last week, been viewed a total of 858 times. That’s enough to call him a celebrity? I guess I’m not the only one not following him. Luckily, another “celebrity” endorsement helped Heartland move some harmonicas.

Ever since I started receiving the catalog, they’ve advertised a “Soul Man” set of seven harmonicas. A few months ago, the listing had the addition of a customer endorsement box, which includes a short customer comment about the product, along with their initials and hometown. “BD” of Hibbing, Minnesota, called the harmonicas “the best.”

I started laughing out loud as soon as I saw it. They want us to think that Bob Dylan bought harmonicas from them, seven for $29.99, and then sent in a fan letter? I suppose I shouldn’t be so cynical. The endorsement ran in two catalogs, then the entire listing disappeared. 

I can think of only two possible explanations. Either Bob’s lawyers forced them to quit using his “endorsement,” or worried that they might run out of stock, Bob bought the remaining inventory before Bruce Springsteen or Neil Young got their hands on them. Maybe Bob will send them a set for Christmas.

Weekly newspaper serving SE Michigan and NW Ohio - State Line Observer ©2006-2016