2007.06.13 I predict I'm going to die, and he's going to get hurt

Written by David Green.


On the way to Ryan Lucas’ open house Saturday I said to David, “Maybe the Begnoches will be there.” He looked at me like I was nuts, so I explained. I figured since Ryan’s open house was at the Weston Methodist Church and Brenda grew up in that church, maybe if they were visiting Brenda’s mom, Joan Waldron, they would all pop in for the open house.

That’s how my mind works...always connecting one thing to another. The only thing I really know about the Weston Methodist Church is that Brenda used to go there and her mom still does. I couldn’t remember when Brenda and her husband Steve would be getting back from a trip to Ireland, but it seemed remotely possible that they could be in town.

David didn’t look too convinced, but as soon as we arrived, I scanned the fellowship hall for Begnoches and was disappointed to discover they weren’t there. Could my powers of premonition and logic be so far off? If I were a better friend, I might have paid attention to when they were returning and called and asked if they were coming.

But,  even after 25 years, we are pretty casual in our friendship. We can go months and months without communicating and then pick up right where we left off. Well, that’s not altogether true. These days, chances of us remembering where we left off are slim to none, but we do always have an enjoyable time with Steve and Brenda.

Anyway, later Saturday night while I was working late at the library, I called David to see if he was at all interested in taking a walk. Imagine my delight when he said, “The Begnoches just walked in the house.” I thought he was messing with my mind, but at the same time it seemed extremely plausible. I could have said, “Yeah, I know,” but I just told him l’d be right home.

I wish I could claim credit for making things happen, but I am not delusional and sometimes I don’t even recognize that what I ask for has arrived.

“We need a handyman to put together those fans,” I said to Liz at the library the other day.

A little while later she nodded her head in the direction of the annex and said, “Joe is over there.”

I didn’t even get the connection, but she meant “your handyman has arrived.”

Poor Joe Timar, a Johnny-on-the-spot ace volunteer, had walked in to the book sale, not knowing he’d be asked to assemble some tower fans to keep the annex air circulating when the summer reading program starts. Heck, we didn’t know it either, but he gamely put them together.

The way these coincidences occur is almost on the eerie side, but it also just seems like that’s the way it works. It also seems like the way forwarded e-mail messages work. My friend Adrienne, the queen of forwarding e-mail (most of which she doesn’t check with snopes.com before she perpetuates mistruths, lies, slander, etc.) always seems to send something that relates to what I’m pondering. The day before the Begnoches arrived she sent an e-mail with a link to a site that shows the price of gas at the stations closest to your zip code. At the bottom of that e-mail was that oft-quoted outlook on life: 

Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming, WOW! What A Ride!

It was with that quote in mind that, at some point in the conversation with the Begnoches, I said I figured I would die soon. I’m 49; my hair is pretty much completely gray; my elbows ache like the dickens in the morning if I’ve been on the computer too long, gardened or done any other physical labor the day before; I have bulges sticking out on my feet (Brenda diagnosed them as bunions); if I kneel too long my knees ache like crazy after I get up. In addition to all that, I have lousy genes; my mother died at 72, my father at 69??

I figure I am not long for this world.

“You better start looking for a younger woman,” I said to David.

He didn’t hesitate before saying, “OK.”

“Well, wait until I croak before you start looking,” I said, changing my tune quickly.

He better watch out—or I’ll predict bodily harm in his future.

    – June 13, 2007
  • Front.cowboy
    A PERFORMER named Biligbaatar, a member of the AnDa Union troupe from Inner Mongolia, dances at Stair District Library last week during a visit to the Midwest. The nine-member group blends a variety of traditions from Inner and Outer Mongolia. The music is described as drawing from “all the Mongol tribes that Genghis Khan unified.” The group considers itself music gatherers whose goal is to preserve traditional sounds of Mongolia. Biligbaatar grew up among traditional herders who live in yurts. Additional photos are on the back page of this week’s Observer.
  • Front.base Ball
    UMPIRE Thomas Henthorn tosses the bat between team captains Mikayla Price and Chuck Piskoti of Flint’s Lumber City Base Ball Club. Following the 1860 rules, after the bat was grabbed by the captains, captains’ hands advanced to the top of the bat—one hand on top of the other. The captain whose hand ended up on top decided who would bat first. Additional photos of Sunday’s game appear on page 12 of this week’s Observer. The contest was organized in conjunction with Stair District Library’s Hometown Teams exhibit that runs through Nov. 20.
  • Front.chat
    VALUE OF ATHLETICS—Morenci graduate John Bancroft (center) takes a turn at the microphone during a chat session at the opening of the Hometown Teams exhibit at Stair District Library. Clockwise to his left is John Dillon, Jed Hall, Jim Bauer, Joe Farquhar, George Hollstein, George Vereecke and Mike McDowell. Thomas Henthorn (at the podium) kicked off the conversation. Henthorn, a University of Michigan–Flint professor, will return to Morenci this Sunday to lead a game of vintage base ball at the school softball field.
  • Front.cross
    HUDSON RUNNER Jacob Morgan looks toward the top of the hill with dismay during the tough finish at Harrison Lake State Park. Fayette runner Jacob Garrow focuses on the summit, also, during the Eagle Invitational cross country run Saturday morning. Continuing rain and drizzle made the course even more challenging. Results of the race are in this week’s Observer.
  • Front.bear
    HOLDEN HUTCHISON gives a hug to a black bear cub—the product of a taxidermist’s skills—at the Michigan DNR’s Great Youth Jamboree. The event on Sunday marked the fourth year of the Jamboree. Additional photos are on page 12.
  • Front.crossing
    Crossing over—Jim Heiney was given a U.S. flag to carry by George Vereecke (behind Jim in the hat), turning him into the leader of the parade. Bridge Walk participants cross over Bean Creek while, in the background, members of the Morenci Legion Riders cross the main traffic bridge on East Street South. Additional photos appear on the back page of this week’s Observer.
  • Front.hose Testing
    HOSE safety—The FireCatt hose testing company from Troy put Morenci Fire Department hose to the test Monday morning when Mill Street was closed to traffic. The company also checks nozzles and ladders for wear in an effort to keep fire fighters safe while on calls.

Weekly newspaper serving SE Michigan and NW Ohio - State Line Observer ©2006-2016