2007.01.24 Read it and weep

Written by David Green.

By COLLEEN LEDDY

My sleeping pattern is beginning to irritate my husband. When left to my own devices, my body inclines toward bedding down at 4 a.m. and waking at noon. This schedule harkens back to college days when I rarely took morning classes. I knew in high school that I would never realize my lifelong dream to be a farmer when, finally given the opportunity to work on a farm, I cringed daily when awakened at 5:30 a.m.

David might not mind my habits so much if I just slipped quietly and unobtrusively into bed, but most nights, especially in the winter, I create a disturbance as I trip over laundry baskets or knock a pile of clothes off my dresser as I add my recently removed sweatshirts and scarf to the mess. And then I fiddle around my bedside table looking for my bed socks. It takes a while for my eyes to adjust to the darkness and I usually send my reading lamp or a box of tissues to the floor as I feel around for the socks.

My feet are freezing, heck, my whole body is ice cold, and I don’t want to shock the heck out of David as I ease my way under the covers. But try as I might, I almost never fail to wake him out of his slumber. In my defense, he is an incredibly light sleeper. Even when I am as quiet as the proverbial mouse, even if he is snoring like a bear in winter, just my mere presence seems to wake him.

It was 5:30 in the morning last week and I had just snuggled into bed. I was deep under the feathers when the idea for a summer reading program theme hit me. The general topic at the library this summer is food and I’ve been kicking around several catchy phrases for several months now, but this was a really good one.

“Read it and eat!” I said aloud, delighted with myself. David had been stirring, so I figured he was awake.

“Read it and eat.”

“Read it and eat.”

“Read it and eat.”

“I don’t have any paper up here,” I said. “I’ve got to remember it. Read it and eat. Read it and eat.”

“Shut up and sleep!” David responded groggily.

I know he’s getting annoyed.

“I want to hear you make a pledge about when you’re going to go to bed tonight,” David said amiably Sunday night after I’d been consistently climbing into bed around 3:00 and 4:00 in the morning.

“I’m gonna try to go to bed at 1:00,” I said, “but I might be in the middle of something.”

“Just put it down and go to bed,” he advised.

“You’ve been married to me for almost 25 years...” I reminded him.

“Yeah, but I slept through most of those years,” he said.

I laughed, but I made a very concerted effort to go to bed early Sunday night. I made it by 1:30, but, unable to sleep, read until 2:30. And then I had the most bizarre dreams. I woke at 9:00 feeling as if I had never slept at all. This early-to-bed business just doesn’t sit well with me.

I will keep trying because I love my husband and he is good to me. Just this evening when I was making dinner and complained of a pounding headache, he retrieved the aspirin for me so I wouldn’t have to dry my hands.

And, in anticipation of frying smells, he offered to replace the nice jacket I had on with the more casual one hanging in the bathroom. We’re always trying to avoid smelling like fried onions.

“It’s the pink one,” I said, referring to a pink sweatshirt with a zippered fleece inside—a double layer against the cold of our house.

As he put the pink sweatshirt through one arm while I pulled cloves of garlic from the bulb, I noticed the inside layer was missing.

“What about the orange one that goes inside?” I asked

He muttered something about pulling that one out because I asked for the pink one, but went to retrieve it

“If you think this is orange...” he started, as he brought it into the kitchen.

“Don’t argue with me,” I warned, head still pounding. “I think I may have a cerebral hemorrhage.”

“There’s not enough cerebral to hemorrhage,” he countered.

He is right, of course. The inside fleece is more maroon than orange. But I’ve moved on to the chopping stage and I’m holding the knife.

    - Jan. 24, 2007 
  • Front.bridge Cross
    STEP BY STEP—Wyatt Stevens of Morenci makes his way across a rope bridge Sunday during the Michigan DNR’s Great Outdoors Jamboree at Lake Hudson Recreation Area. The Tecumseh Boy Scout Troop constructed the bridge again this year after taking a break in 2016. The Jamboree offered a variety of activities for a wide range of age groups. Morenci’s Stair District Library set up activities again this year and had visits with dozens of kids. See the back page for additional photos.
  • Front.bridge.17
    LEADING THE WAY—The Morenci Area High School marching band led the way across the pedestrian bridge on Morenci’s south side for the annual Labor Day Bridge Walk. The Band Boosters shared profits from the sale of T-shirts with the walk’s sponsor, the Morenci Area Chamber of Commerce. Additional photos are on the back page.
  • Front.eclipse
    LOOKING UP—More than 200 people showed up at Stair District Library Monday afternoon to view the big celestial event with free glasses provided by a grant from the Space Science Institute. The library offered craft activities from noon to 1 p.m., refreshments including Cosmic Cake from Zingerman’s Bakehouse and a live viewing of the eclipse from NASA on a large screen. As the sky darkened slightly, more and more people moved outside to the sidewalk to take a look at the shrinking sun. If you missed it, hang on for the next total eclipse in 2024 as the path comes even closer to this area.
  • Cecil
    THE MAYOR—Cecil Schoonover poses with a collection of garden gnomes that mysteriously arrive and disappear from his property. Along with the gnomes, someone created the sign stating that he is the Mayor of Gnomesville. He hasn’t yet tracked down the people involved in the prank, but he’s having a good time with the mystery.
  • Front.rest
    TAKE A BREAK—Last Wednesday’s session of Stair District Library’s Summer Reading Program ended with a quiet period in a class presented by yoga instructor Melany Gladieux of Toledo. Children learned a variety of yoga poses in the main room at the library, then finished off the session relaxing. Additional photos are on page 7. Area children are invited to visit the library today when the Michigan Science Center presents a flight program at 11 a.m. and roller coasters at 1 p.m.
  • Front.batter
    THE DERBY—Tyler “Smallpox” Flakne of Minnesota’s Home Run League All-Stars goes for the fence Friday night during the National Wiffle League Association’s home run derby in Morenci. This year the wiffleball national tournament moved from Dublin, Ohio, to Morenci’s Wakefield Park. During the derby, competitors had two minutes to hit as many home runs as possible. The winner this year finished with 21. See page 6 and 7 for additional photos.
  • Front.green Screen
    OUT OF THIS WORLD—Elizabeth McFadden and Elise Christle pose in front of the green screen as VolunTeen Noah Gilson makes them appear as though they are standing on the Moon. More photos from the Stair District Library’s NASA @ My Library program are on page 12.
  • Front.fireworks
    FIREWORKS erupt Saturday night over Morenci’s Wakefield Park during the waning hours of the Town and Country Festival. Additional festival photos are inside.
  • Front.batter

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