2009.01.21 No special needs, but he's lacking Ls

Written by David Green.


My husband is one of the most extraordinary and lucky people I have ever met. He can take vigorous walks or cross country ski without ever having to stop and blow his nose. I, on the other hand, never leave home without a stack of folded tissues in my pocket.

“Use your sleeve,” he says, but the level of mucus leaving my drippy nose can not be alleviated by sleeve wiping, and besides that, it’s gross. I tell him this and he has more advice.

“Just do like a real outdoorswoman. Turn your head to the side, cover one nostril and blow.”

I think that’s perhaps grosser yet.

I tell him I suffer from a condition.

I can hear him pooh-pooh me just by the way he raises his eyebrows and tilts his head, not by any words he speaks.

“It’s true,” I say, “it’s genetic. Just like there are people whose urine is affected by asparagus and people who think cilantro tastes like soap.”

I can’t imagine the injustice of a life spent not liking cilantro—it’s one of the most majestic of foods. When I sniff cilantro it just makes my whole body smile. It’s like entering an altogether different world of flavor, engaging all the senses.

I look up my leaky nose on the internet and indeed there it is: exercise-induced rhinitis—a runny nose caused by exercise. I send David the link, but he has no comment.

He is such a lucky guy, so unencumbered by the burdens of daily life—at least the burdens I face daily.

He can go long periods of time without visiting a bathroom, whereas I take advantage of every bathroom I pass. It’s not just that I have a thing for bathrooms... because I do. I like to check them out in restaurants and even the public areas of hotels. Gas stations? Not so much—but if we’re on a journey and that’s the only stop we’re making, I’m all over it.

I vow to model his light packing prowess, but I think I am doomed in that department, especially when visiting warm locales such as Miami and New Orleans in the winter months. I just hate being cold as a result of an inadequate supply of clothes. So, my suitcase contains as many long sleeves as short ones.

David doesn’t mind wearing the same clothes over and over. Me, I can’t put on the same shirt I sweated in yesterday. But David? I swear the man just doesn’t sweat. Not in daily life and not even when exerting himself.

We went cross country skiing the other day and while I breathed the heavy heaves of a woman about to drop dead and sweated myself into a state of cold wetness, David spoke in normal tones and hadn’t even begun to perspire.

He treads so lightly on the earth—he hardly ever buys anything, he’ll eat most anything put before him, his needs are so few. He’s the antithesis of a special needs person in every way. I’m a leaky complicated kind of crazy mess in comparison.

The only thing he’s lacking is Ls.

A friend asked if I was into numerology after I wrote about the 50/58 guiding force behind celebrating from David’s birthday to mine. I don’t think I am so much...although I still have that number 57 dogging me every now and then.

But I realized it’s not just numbers that influence my life...letters are also part of the picture—specifically the letter L. I noticed it when glancing at an email I sent with the subject “LL meeting.” That made me chuckle...I’ve gone from three Ls to two Ls.

I used to be a La Leche League (LLL) leader (I suppose I could say four Ls then) to being an LL: Lenawee Librarian. I probably wouldn’t have noticed this if my name weren’t full of Ls...two in Colleen and one in Leddy.

Ls seem like a good thing, if only because lucky starts with one and also other wonderful words like life, love and laughter. And David doesn’t have any. Maybe he isn’t so lucky after all.

  • Front.poles
    MOVING EAST—Utility workers continue their slow progress east along U.S. 20 south of Morenci. New electrical poles are put in place before wiring is moved into place.
  • Front.cowboy
    A PERFORMER named Biligbaatar, a member of the AnDa Union troupe from Inner Mongolia, dances at Stair District Library last week during a visit to the Midwest. The nine-member group blends a variety of traditions from Inner and Outer Mongolia. The music is described as drawing from “all the Mongol tribes that Genghis Khan unified.” The group considers itself music gatherers whose goal is to preserve traditional sounds of Mongolia. Biligbaatar grew up among traditional herders who live in yurts. Additional photos are on the back page of this week’s Observer.
  • Front.base Ball
    UMPIRE Thomas Henthorn tosses the bat between team captains Mikayla Price and Chuck Piskoti of Flint’s Lumber City Base Ball Club. Following the 1860 rules, after the bat was grabbed by the captains, captains’ hands advanced to the top of the bat—one hand on top of the other. The captain whose hand ended up on top decided who would bat first. Additional photos of Sunday’s game appear on page 12 of this week’s Observer. The contest was organized in conjunction with Stair District Library’s Hometown Teams exhibit that runs through Nov. 20.
  • Front.chat
    VALUE OF ATHLETICS—Morenci graduate John Bancroft (center) takes a turn at the microphone during a chat session at the opening of the Hometown Teams exhibit at Stair District Library. Clockwise to his left is John Dillon, Jed Hall, Jim Bauer, Joe Farquhar, George Hollstein, George Vereecke and Mike McDowell. Thomas Henthorn (at the podium) kicked off the conversation. Henthorn, a University of Michigan–Flint professor, will return to Morenci this Sunday to lead a game of vintage base ball at the school softball field.
  • Front.cross
    HUDSON RUNNER Jacob Morgan looks toward the top of the hill with dismay during the tough finish at Harrison Lake State Park. Fayette runner Jacob Garrow focuses on the summit, also, during the Eagle Invitational cross country run Saturday morning. Continuing rain and drizzle made the course even more challenging. Results of the race are in this week’s Observer.
  • Front.bear
    HOLDEN HUTCHISON gives a hug to a black bear cub—the product of a taxidermist’s skills—at the Michigan DNR’s Great Youth Jamboree. The event on Sunday marked the fourth year of the Jamboree. Additional photos are on page 12.
  • Front.hose Testing
    HOSE safety—The FireCatt hose testing company from Troy put Morenci Fire Department hose to the test Monday morning when Mill Street was closed to traffic. The company also checks nozzles and ladders for wear in an effort to keep fire fighters safe while on calls.

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