2013.03.27 A magazine for only $12,168

Written by David Green.

By DAVID GREEN

There's a magazine for everything in the world. Every interest, every profession, every course of study.

My wife brought a catalogue of periodicals home from the library because she’s planning to add a few new magazines to the collection. Colleen walked by while I was flipping through the catalogue and she looked at a page of magazines highlighted in an ad. 

"I'd like that one," she said, pointing at "Saveur," a magazine with the slogan "Savoring the World of Authentic Cuisine." Nine issues a year for 30 bucks.

She pointed at "Working Mothers" and joked, "They don't have time to read." Next she touched "Parenting, School Years," and said the library already takes that one but it's very seldom checked out.

It seems that she has a tough job ahead. Should she get "Batwoman"? "Amateur Wrestling News"? "Armchair General"?

Sometimes the first challenge is figuring out what the magazine is about. "Ad Astra." Any guesses? Of course you know that's Latin for "to the stars." What about "Animal Man"? I figured that was...well, I don't know. Some manly periodical about men and their love of animals. I was very wrong. Twelve issues for $25 tell the story of Buddy Baker who gained animal powers after an encounter with a space station that blew up and irradiated him. It's a superhero comic book.

"Weatherwise" is a little pricey—only six issues for $188. I think I was a subscriber to that magazine once, or at least I ended up with a few issues somehow. It was back in my early high school days when I wanted to be a weatherman.

At the back of the catalogue, all the titles are divided into a Topical Index of Periodicals, from Aeronautics & Aviation to Youth. In the middle is the category called General Interest. There are several dozen here, from "15 a 20" to "Yes: Journal of Positive Futures." The first is for chicas between the ages of 15 and 20; the second attempts to reframe the world's problems into solutions—for those of you who are tired of bad news.

In between those two magazines are many that seem misplaced in the General Interest category. "Containerisation International" publishes personalized news of the container industry—containers as in container ships. It must be good. Twelve issues costs $1,640. It's something everyone needs on their coffee table.

The American Naturalist Supplement comes out only once a year, at a cost of $580. At first I thought naturist—as in people who frequent nude beaches—but I was way off. Here's a sample story: "High-stress Subterranean Habitats and Evolutionary Change in Cave-Inhabiting Arthropods." And worth every penny.

"Phronesis" (four issues, $452) is "the most authoritarian scholarly journal of the study of Ancient Greek and Roman thought."

"Mammalia" is a little cheaper at four issues for $338. With this magazine, you can read about high elevation records of ocelots in Jalisco, Mexico, and the effect of seed availability on hoarding behaviors of the Siberian chipmunk. You can just sit and marvel at the things scientists spend time studying. But General Interest?

One of the cheaper periodicals listed is called "Men's Fraternity—Quest for Authentic Manhood." It's listed as just one issue for $10. Is it for you? It is if you have a "distorted idea of biblical masculinity." I could be wrong, but I don't expect to see this one on Colleen's order list.

Maybe she'll go with "Garden and Gun," described as the "best of the South" lifestyle. Could be a guide to keeping rabbits away from your kale and broccoli.

The big prices of some periodicals put me on the hunt to find the most expensive. "Plant Cell and Environment" comes your way for $5,571 a year. Hold on: "Science of the Total Environment" runs $7,924 annually, but there are 24 issues.

We're not done yet. "Molecular Ecology Package" costs $9,796 but it's a generous 30 issues. There's one more to go: "Journal of Materials Science" will stretch the budget of any library at $12,168 a year, even though there are 48 exciting issues.

When you check that one out of the library, please don't keep it on the coffee table.

  • Front.tug
    MORENCI pep rallies generally end with a tug of war. The senior class entry, shown above, did not advance to the finals. Griffin Grieder, Alaina Webster, Kyle Long and Jazmin Smith are shown at the front of the rope, giving it their best effort.
  • Accident
    FAYETTE resident Patricia Stambaugh, 64, was declared dead on the scene of a single-vehicle accident Friday morning south of Morenci. Rescue units were called around 9 a.m., but as of Tuesday, law enforcement officers had not yet determined the time of the accident. According to Ohio State Highway Patrol, Stambaugh was driving west on U.S. 20 when her Chevrolet Malibu traveled off the north side of the road and down a steep embankment, coming to rest in Bean Creek (Tiffin River).
  • Athletic Fields
    SPORTS COMPLEX—Fayette’s outdoor athletic facilities will include three ball fields for summer recreation leagues at the southwest corner of the school. The baseball and softball fields, along with the running track, will be constructed on the east side of the school. Outdoor athletic fields were not part of the new school project from 2007, but voters approved a $1.4 million levy for a school addition and the sports fields last August. Both projects are scheduled to be complete by July 20.
  • Front.teacher Leading
    PRESCHOOL MUSIC—Fayette band director Jeffrey Dunford spends the last half hour of the day leading the full-day preschool class in musical activities. Additional photos are on page 7 of this week’s Observer.
  • Front.F.band
    TROMBONISTS Jake Myers (left) and Max Baker perform Friday at the annual Senior Citizens Luncheon at Fayette High School. The National Honor Society and the FFA chapter teamed up to serve a meal to area seniors and to provide musical entertainment. Both the school band and choir performed. Additional photos are on page 7 of this week’s Observer.
  • Station.2
    STRANGE STUFF—Morenci Elementary School students learn that blue isn’t really blue when seen through the right color of lens. Volunteer April Pike presents the lesson to students at one of the many stations brought to the school by the COSI science center. The theme of this year’s visit was the solar system.
  • Front.poles
    MOVING EAST—Utility workers continue their slow progress east along U.S. 20 south of Morenci. New electrical poles are put in place before wiring is moved into place.

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