2007.12.27 Looking south to a new year

Written by David Green.


It’s almost over and perhaps you feel a sense of relief. 2007 might have been a little more than you could handle and you need a break.

Despite all the stuff that happened this year, at least you can feel good about all the things that didn’t happen.

I realize I could be putting my foot in mouth here. It’s only Dec. 27 and there are still a few days remaining. Anything could happen—any incredibly weird thing. Out on the limb I go. Here’s what did not happen in 2007, despite the predictions.

1. We weren’t destroyed by the pesky Planet X

Barry Warmkessel predicted the Earth would be struck by comets related to our Sun’s dark twin, Vulcan. Crop circles, Wormwood, dark visions—it’s pretty heavy reading, but so far we’re still spinning.

2. The Battle of Armageddon didn’t begin

Armageddon Online predicted the battle would begin in 2007. If that isn’t enough, an island collapse in the Atlantic would wipe out the East Coast due to a tsunami wave thousands of feet tall.

And if that isn’t enough, a super volcano in Yellowstone Park would destroy America. Or there’s always the aliens.

Lots to read and dwell upon there, too.

3. Goodbye denim

Enough of the doom and gloom. What about fashion? Hadley Freeman, fashion writer on the Guardian newspaper, predicted that customer fatigue, overexposure and the lack of any new style possible means that denim will no longer generate excitement. Of course everyone will still wear blue jeans, it’s just that leggings and tunic dresses with tights will rule.

So how did she do with that prediction? One daughter, dressed in jeans, says there’s some truth to that one.

4. Google will buy Google

Wired magazine’s Lore Sjöberg predicted that the next logical acquisition in Google’s quest to rule the world will be the acquisition of itself.

I like this guy’s self-introduction: “Born helpless, nude and unable to provide for himself, Lore Sjöberg eventually overcame these handicaps to become a visionary, a secretary and a cassowary.”

In case you’re not remembering, a cassowary is a large flightless bird with a  horny crested head.

5. John Howard prevails

Some prognosticators enjoy digging into the crystal ball of politics. Someone at Kuro5hin predicted that John Howard would remain prime minister of Australia. Actually, he was defeated decisively by Kevin Rudd. However, there’s a YouTube video that shows Kevin Rudd picking his ear and bringing his finger to his mouth.

What will Kevin Rudd eat in 2008?

6. Computers take over

Here’s an interesting one, because the prediction was made in 1997 for the year 2007. The late Timothy Leary predicted every schoolchild will have his/her own computer, and that it will be as disposable as a pair of sneakers. Not a bad guess, but not quite, Tim.

An OMNI opinion poll weighed in on that issue and 41 percent of those responding were dreaming a little too far into the future: “Computers will supplement human teachers in nearly every classroom, and software will replace textbooks as the primary source of teaching material.” Half right, perhaps.

7. War with Iran

John Hogue is apparently a fairly well-know prognosticator—his says prophet—who predicted war with Iran by March 2007 unless Congress could stop the President’s actions. Save that one for 2008.

8. Injury to Simon Cowell

Former MTV VJ Adam Curry predicted Simon Cowell would suffer physical injury after an American Idol sore loser accosts him at a public appearance. I don’t know, did this one ever happen?

9. Home from Iraq

Psychic Sylvia Browne spoke of U.S. troops coming home from Iraq and President Bush’s approval rating moving upward.

Ouch! A double loss on that one.

Rather than look through the misses a year from now, I’m turning to FengShuiWeb to see how to live right in the next year.

“When at work, you may sit facing the south direction, but do not sit with your back to the south or you may find unscrupulous people working against you or you may encounter undue gossip and back-stabbing during the year.”

I’m facing south, and I’m looking forward to a good year free of gossip—about me, that is.

  • Front.cowboy
    A PERFORMER named Biligbaatar, a member of the AnDa Union troupe from Inner Mongolia, dances at Stair District Library last week during a visit to the Midwest. The nine-member group blends a variety of traditions from Inner and Outer Mongolia. The music is described as drawing from “all the Mongol tribes that Genghis Khan unified.” The group considers itself music gatherers whose goal is to preserve traditional sounds of Mongolia. Biligbaatar grew up among traditional herders who live in yurts. Additional photos are on the back page of this week’s Observer.
  • Front.base Ball
    UMPIRE Thomas Henthorn tosses the bat between team captains Mikayla Price and Chuck Piskoti of Flint’s Lumber City Base Ball Club. Following the 1860 rules, after the bat was grabbed by the captains, captains’ hands advanced to the top of the bat—one hand on top of the other. The captain whose hand ended up on top decided who would bat first. Additional photos of Sunday’s game appear on page 12 of this week’s Observer. The contest was organized in conjunction with Stair District Library’s Hometown Teams exhibit that runs through Nov. 20.
  • Front.chat
    VALUE OF ATHLETICS—Morenci graduate John Bancroft (center) takes a turn at the microphone during a chat session at the opening of the Hometown Teams exhibit at Stair District Library. Clockwise to his left is John Dillon, Jed Hall, Jim Bauer, Joe Farquhar, George Hollstein, George Vereecke and Mike McDowell. Thomas Henthorn (at the podium) kicked off the conversation. Henthorn, a University of Michigan–Flint professor, will return to Morenci this Sunday to lead a game of vintage base ball at the school softball field.
  • Front.cross
    HUDSON RUNNER Jacob Morgan looks toward the top of the hill with dismay during the tough finish at Harrison Lake State Park. Fayette runner Jacob Garrow focuses on the summit, also, during the Eagle Invitational cross country run Saturday morning. Continuing rain and drizzle made the course even more challenging. Results of the race are in this week’s Observer.
  • Front.bear
    HOLDEN HUTCHISON gives a hug to a black bear cub—the product of a taxidermist’s skills—at the Michigan DNR’s Great Youth Jamboree. The event on Sunday marked the fourth year of the Jamboree. Additional photos are on page 12.
  • Front.hose Testing
    HOSE safety—The FireCatt hose testing company from Troy put Morenci Fire Department hose to the test Monday morning when Mill Street was closed to traffic. The company also checks nozzles and ladders for wear in an effort to keep fire fighters safe while on calls.

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