2007.10.24 It's all so hot

Written by David Green.

By DAVID GREEN

I look forward to Rolling Stone magazine’s Hot List. I don’t recall if it’s an annual event or something that appears more often, but for me it’s the time to find out how culturally illiterate I really am.

People I’ve never heard of doing things I didn’t know were possible using tools I never knew existed.

The implication of the Hot List is that this is what’s big these days. For someone living in a place such as Morenci, it’s more like a look into the future, a glimpse of what will eventually trickle down to Little Town. Or not.

Here’s a tidbit that caught my fancy, although the use of the invention in Morenci is somewhat limited. There are two guys who call themselves the Graffiti Research Lab and their business is urban communication.

They’ve developed the technology for creating gigantic laser graffiti on the sides of skyscrapers. It looks like someone picked up a can of spray paint and painted a glowing slogan in the night—across a 20 story building. The image even has realistic drips, and it all disappears with the touch of a button.

That hot report is filed under Tech. When you go to jobs, you learn there’s a hot new opportunity in marijuana trimming. It’s listed as particularly good work for the nomadic surfer/snowboard type who occasionally needs to earn some cash.

Every fall, hundreds of young people head for the marijuana farms of northern California or British Columbia to extract marijuana buds from the leaf and stalk. It pays $250 a pound, plus all you can smoke.

Once again, not the sort of work you’re likely to find in this part of the country.

The Hot Land Grab section points to six areas of the country that will be ripe for investment as the world turns warmer. Rolling Stone puts it this way: “Want to make a buck off climate change? Get a jump on the land rush that will inevitably accompany environmental disaster if warming continues at current rates.”

Rising seas and warmer temperatures make several areas look less attractive, but the Northwest and the Northeast are looking good. Northern New England could become the new wine country.

And this area? We’re right in the middle of the scale for temperature increases. You’re going to sweat it out here on the farm.

The Hot Conspiracy Theory, naturally, is the NAFTA Superhighway. Twelve lanes wide, from Mexico City to Toronto—the road that will destroy America and merge us into a single nation with our neighbors to the north and south.

This one is so hot that the Montana legislature passed a resolution stating its opposition. Some people have already obtained the new Amero coin that we will all use. Presidential candidate Ron Paul says it’s very real; Dick Cheney says it isn’t. Now who are you going to believe?

One of the roadmaps has it coming right up I-69 past Angola, Ind., so this hot myth almost touches us.

Check out the Hot Youngsters tip. Thirteen-year-old Ivan and and his 11-year-old sister Ada make up the garage-punk music duo Tiny Masters of Today. David Bowie says they’re genius and apparently he’s still hot enough that his words have meaning.

Ivan says he’d like to buy a school bus, splatter paint it, fill it with vending machines and drive it across the country. But that’s a few years down the Superhighway when he actually obtains a driver’s license.

The Hot Mood is described as ignoring reality. It’s what keeps America moving forward through an endless war, a sagging economy, an erosion of rights, a changing climate—oh, did I mention a growing paranoia?

Just don’t tell me about it and it will surely all go away.

What’s hot in Morenci? There’s a new rooster in the neighborhood. I’ve heard it crowing now and then.

I know it’s illegal and I figure someone will complain and then an area family will be dining on chicken soup before long. But for now, that rooster makes my Morenci Hot List ‘07.

File it under Hot Morning Sound.

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